Bilal

I’m still waiting for the day when I don’t have pain

In April 2020, I returned home from the hospital after a successful surgery. I began sleeping much more than usual. But, when my sister came to visit, she saw that my face was blue. She called 911, and I returned to the hospital, where I was diagnosed with Covid.

Breathing was agony; it felt like my lungs were on fire. I stopped eating and was nauseous, losing forty pounds. For a month, I was alone and isolated in an ICU room filled with beeping monitors and alarms going off. My respiration rate was high because my body was struggling to get oxygen. My muscles atrophied, and I was constantly fatigued.

One of my nurses, who’d survived Covid, put her hand on my arm and said, “Nobody understands the pain unless they’ve gone through it. You will survive.” I cried.

I was told that my heart rate dropped very low at times, and I was near death, but somehow I survived. I was given three experimental drugs, and perhaps they helped. I’m not sure why I made it through.

Once home, I found that narcotics did not ease my pain. I tried over-the-counter drugs, but they did not help. I tried natural remedies, but nothing worked. Eventually, I tried Kratom, a  therapeutic herb. I mix Kratom and kale powder with other herbs and supplements. This mixture gives me some pain relief, although it tastes disgusting.

I think I’m about thirty percent productive now compared to what I was pre-Covid. People don’t realize that I’m often working on my cell phone from bed.

It took about seven months for the fluid to drain from my lungs, and the pain from breathing to dissipate. Then, I began to notice other nervous symptom issues. Sometimes my body becomes hypersensitive which is very painful. I must stop what I’m doing until my body quiets down.

I’m still waiting for the day when I don’t have pain.

A silver lining is that my natural immunity to Covid seems to have been extended. 

I am pro-vaccine. I was approved to get the vaccine on 8/2 and got it.