“We've seen a lot of death, more than what I expected. I know people die in this population, but it came so fast and furious. It wasn't what I was expected.”

This is part of a series on Grace Heights Health and Rehabilitation — which had over 40 residents and 35 staff members test positive for COVID.

MORGANTON, NORTH CAROLINA: We had a respiratory virus go through our building back in February. So, we thought that we'd already had COVID because we were really sick for about 2 - 3 weeks including several of our staff members and myself. So I thought, “We’ve probably already been exposed to it. Once it comes through, it'll be like the flu. We'll get it, we'll move on and our life will be fine.” But, when it did, it was very different. It is one of those very invasive viruses. Once it's in the building, no matter what you do, you can't slow it down. It's gonna come and everybody's going to be exposed to it eventually. We've seen a lot of death, more than what I expected. I know people die in this population, but it came so fast and furious. It wasn't what I was expected.

Once it's in the building, no matter what you do, you can't slow it down. It's gonna come and everybody's going to be exposed to it eventually.

I could tell that my patients were getting sicker and I told my husband, “Something's going on. I want to move out until I figure out what's going on with everybody. I just don't feel comfortable.” I have my three younger children and my mom who’s 82 living at home with me. I would be terrified if I brought this home and then my mom ended up passing away. I couldn't deal with that. So, I moved out of my house and lived apart from my family for a month.

Later, I went back and looked at past visits with patients. I could see the ones who died during the pandemic I had seen more frequently during that last month for general weird stuff like respiratory issues and acute illnesses. That was when the CDC was telling us we shouldn't wearing masks because that scares the patients. So, we didn't. 

 the CDC was telling us we shouldn't be wearing masks because that scares the patients. 

We were probably the first building around here to get COVID. The first patient I was exposed to was the first death here in our county. With the two patients I know I had direct exposure to, I don’t remember anyone coughing on me. I just talked with them going over their discharge instructions. At one point, I leaned over to do a professional assessment. It wasn't like I was in there for 30 minutes, but I guess that's all it took. I wasn’t wearing a mask or glasses with those two.

It wasn't like I was in there for 30 minutes, but I guess that's all it took.

I wasn’t scared. I kind of thought that I'm young and healthy. I don't have any underlying medical problems. I figured I would blow through it and be back to work. I wasn't. I was out of work for a month. 

 I figured I would blow through it and be back to work. I wasn't. I was out of work for a month. 

My initial symptom was a pervasive headache across the front of my head. That lasted for about a week. Tylenol and Ibuprofen really didn't touch it that much. It was there all the time. I started running a low-grade fever, but my temperature would never have met the criteria to get tested if I hadn't worked at Grace Heights. They weren't testing people unless you were over a hundred.

my temperature would never have met the criteria to get tested

I was scared to go to the hospital. I wouldn't go. I was by myself so I couldn’t drive because it's not safe to drive 20 minutes to the hospital with SVT (Supraventricular Tachycardia). I assume it was probably CT. But if I called the ambulance, I would expose those workers. I didn’t feel comfortable doing that. If I called my husband, who had been segregating himself from me, I would expose him. So I just waited it out. It stopped eventually, but it was not fun.

I was actively sick for about 10 days. I had a fever, bone aches, joint pain, and fatigue. It never felt like I was coughing my head off. I had more tachycardia and loss of taste and smell. I got a copper penny taste in my mouth. It was like I was chewing copper pennies. Every two to three days, I would work myself up to take a shower. Just taking a bath and I'd be like, “This is how it's going to end,” because I couldn't breathe. “This is sad. I'm a 46-year-old woman. I should be able to do this.” Just picking up the laundry basket, carrying it to the bed, and folding clothes was wearing me out. 

It was like I was chewing copper pennies.

I ended up with thrush, where you have white spots on your tongue like a yeast infection in your mouth. So, I dealt with that. It's usually when your body takes antibiotics that kill your good bacteria along with your bad, but I wasn't on any antibiotics and never took antibiotics. I think it's an immune response. Your body's not responding to things the way it's supposed to.

I did a lot of over the counter stuff: vitamin C, vitamin D, Quercetin, Tylenol, and melatonin because I had horrible insomnia. I took those for about a month. I did a lot of sleeping. I had a lot of brain fog. I  couldn't concentrate. People thought I’d binge watch TV, but I didn't really have the energy to do that. I felt so bad that I didn't really have time to think about feeling bad. I just kind of laid there!

I felt so bad that I didn't really have time to think about feeling bad.

My husband was really good. He would bring me food and lay it down at the end of the porch. We would visit with him out in the yard and I would sit on the porch. He used me as an excuse. If he didn't want to talk to people, he said, “Well you know my wife has the corona don't you?” That’s my husband’s sense of humor.

If he didn't want to talk to people, he said, “Well you know my wife has the corona don't you?” That’s my husband’s sense of humor.

The residual stuff is very draining. I don't bother telling people about it because people think you're stupid or crazy and that you're just making stuff up. So you just kind of shuffle along and keep doing what you're doing. I never went back to the doctor cause I'm like, it's still just symptoms. I managed with over the counter medications. There's no magical pill that you can give me to make it go away.

The residual stuff is very draining.

Now I feel like I have muffled hearing. It’s not as crisp. I had to go buy a new stethoscope because I couldn't hear anything. I lost the sensation in the tips of my fingers. I had an older iPhone and for some reason, it stopped recognizing my fingerprint so couldn't activate my iPhone. I was having to put in my passcode every time. I went and bought a new phone because I couldn't deal with the frustration. I got the one with facial recognition, but that still doesn't work with the mask.

I noticed my vision changed for a while. It was more blurry. Things were a little hazy looking. That still happens sometimes. My vision is not what it was, but I haven't bothered to go back and get a recheck for my prescription glasses.

I love fluffy reading. It’s something I do every day and I couldn't do that! I would sit down to try and focus on what I had done for that patient and I could not formulate words to put on a piece of paper. I just couldn't and I was exhausted. The more I tried, the harder it got. I would do what I could and then stop. That’s still ongoing. I have 6 - 10 good hours. After that, I'm pretty worthless. I kinda just paced myself. This job has allowed me the flexibility to be able to still function. I try keeping up with the production of what I was doing.

I have 6 - 10 good hours. After that, I'm pretty worthless.

When you've had it, no one wants to touch you. It’s hard to get medical care because people don't want to treat you because they don't know enough about it. They're too scared. When you say the word, everybody steps back. I tell them I don't have it, but I'm still dealing with issues from it. People look at you funny. You'll hear people say they don’t believe it's a big deal. They'd say, “I've never known anybody.”I would tell them, “I've had it! it's real! Yes, it can be deadly!” And they look at me funny! 

It’s hard to get medical care because people don't want to treat you because they don't know enough about it. 

You can't have family reunions. You can't get back together with people you love and give them a hug and tell them, “We're all in this together!”

Nobody in my family contracted it, which gives me concern because my family is going back to school. I was so regimented about not exposing my family, but they're still going to get exposed somewhere. I have a teenager and of course, they want to get out and drive and do whatever. I ask, “Do y'all not understand how sick I was?” People still have their own beliefs and teenagers don't understand things. They think they are 10 feet tall and bulletproof. The healthiest person can get very sick and it can have lasting effects that you don't expect. The ones who had it, definitely don't want to go through it again.

I'm blessed and thankful that I didn't have to go through the worst of it. We definitely have seen more of our fair share.