Dr. Marjorie Roberts

“When I caught COVID, I was mad. I was mad at whoever gave it to me. I was really angry. I was hostile. I won’t lie. I was bitter. But maybe the person that gave it to me might not be so lucky. My friend died from COVID and when my friend died, I felt like I couldn't be mad anymore. I have to live.”

ATLANTA, GEORGIA: It started on March 26, 2020. On the way back from the mailbox, I stumbled and lost my balance. When I tried to go to the right, my body went to the left and when I tried to go to the left, my body went to the right. I wondered what was going on with me. Somehow I made it back to my place and laid down. I just thought it was because I was going through menopause. 

When I woke up from the nap, I could not move. The room appeared to be spinning. I had no balance. I thought, “What the hell is going on with me? ” I lay there waiting for my husband to come home. 

The next morning, I was so tired and weak I felt like I worked four doubles. I have never felt that tired in my life. All of a sudden, bam, I had no energy. I thought, “Maybe it's my allergies” because of all the trees, but as the day went on, I got weaker. I was not able to breathe. I couldn't even walk from the bedroom to the table without needing my husband’s help. I thought it couldn't be COVID. 

I lost my appetite in the beginning. I couldn't eat anything. Everything tasted the same for a while. Even if I seasoned it, everything tasted bland or like iron. At the same time, I did not lose my sense of smell. 

I had the worst nightmares in the second and third week. I used to sit up all night and watch TV to keep myself awake. Then there was acid reflux and diarrhea simultaneously. I couldn't breathe. I panted like a dog. I couldn't do anything for myself. 

I couldn’t walk far by myself. I couldn’t go out. My husband had to take me out to get fresh air or to do any regular chores. I had to carry an oximeter with me because it makes sure that my oxygen level is maintained. I was scared.

Finally, I had to go to the hospital. I was scared because COVID was there and people were dying in the hospital, but I got so sick that I had to go. I was taken to the emergency room where they did all kinds of tests. My husband and daughter had to leave me at the door of the hospital so I was in the room by myself scared. I was petrified because nobody could come inside the hospital with me. A nurse came in and shoved the thing up my nose. A couple of hours later, they came and told me that I didn’t have COVID and asked me to go home. They told me that I only had an upper respiratory infection, recommended I drink plenty of water and stay hydrated. I thanked Jesus that I didn’t have COVID. 

When I came back home, I got even sicker. I had never been that sick in my life. I couldn't eat, couldn't sleep, couldn't drink, couldn't breathe. I was not able to do anything. I called my primary doctor but they were not seeing anybody. 

My daughter and husband asked me to go back to the hospital. The second time I went to the emergency room, they did the same test and told me again that I was fine and I didn’t have COVID. They said I didn’t need to know this again and that I had already been through this. According to them, it was just an upper respiratory infection. I begged for help but they again sent me back home again. 

My daughter and I also had a talk about my will and insurance policy, because we thought that I was going to die. I made sure that she knew what I have written in my will. She should follow it to the tee. But to have that conversation with Leanne was scary because she's my only child. I had never been so sick in all my life.

Finally, I reached my primary doctor and told her my symptoms. She has been my doctor for five years. I thought my doctor knew me. She knew my body. She knew my personality. But she didn't believe me. She told me to stop watching so much television and to stop mimicking what was happening in the world. She told me to watch good movies that will make me feel positive. She told me that I was stressed. She prescribed me some anxiety medication only. But, I knew that it was not stress. I was a single parent. I went to school nine years straight and got my doctorate. I know what stress is. She didn’t help me so I went back home.

I would never, ever, make up a lie about myself like that. The fact that my doctor didn't believe me was devastating. It hurt me that she didn't believe me. Why didn't she go through the records? Why did she not pay attention to me?

But, I was adamant to talk to somebody. I kept thinking, “Then why the hell am I so sick? Why is my life turned upside down? Why can't I function? Why can't I get out of bed for days at a time? I can't do anything.” This time I found a new doctor. She made an appointment with me through Zoom. She asked to see all my records back from April. It was now mid-June. After going through my reports, she told me there were a lot of red flags. Things were growing in my lungs, nodules, scar tissue, and my lymph nodes in my lungs were swollen. She said, “Your last test was false? There's no way. Your numbers are all over the place.” 

She asked me for another blood test so that she could give me the right treatment. After going through the blood reports, she told me that my sedimentation level was extremely high, which meant there was inflammation. She was shocked to know that my old doctor didn’t see it and didn't believe me. The x-ray and CT scan were done weeks before, but she didn't bother to look at it. My new doctor found everything and confirmed that I had COVID as I had a lot of damage to my lungs.

All the time that has passed, I could have died. 

When I caught COVID, I was mad. I was mad at whoever gave it to me. I was really angry. I was hostile. I won’t lie. I was bitter. But maybe the person that gave it to me might not be so lucky. My friend died from COVID and when my friend died, I felt like I couldn't be mad anymore. I have to live. 

There are some lingering symptoms, fatigue, and shortness of breath. The shortness of breath comes when it wants to. But, fatigue is something I can't do anything about. I take my vitamins and don't want to exert myself because I don't want to see what will happen if I do so.

My life has been forever changed, but I thank God every day that I am alive. I thank God that I have health insurance and I have a husband who loves me. 

Symptoms: loss of appetite, loss of taste, diarrhea, nightmares,  

Treatment: therapist and 25 milligrams of blood pressure medicine

Coping Mechanisms: joining groups on Facebook, praying, my family’s support.

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